Friday, December 9, 2016

The First Snow (Part 2)

Then there's the whole problem of snow removal.

Toward the end of last winter, I made the miraculous discovery that Sky loves the snow blower (and that he is finally tall enough to maneuver it on his own, which is actually pretty important).  Apparently the combination of the vibration (that fulfills his constant desire for proprioceptive input) and snow flying in chaotic but somehow predictable arcs (giving him an outlet for his visual stim which seeks to see just how things fly apart) makes for a really enjoyable way for him to spend time in the snow. Plus he gets bonus points for doing a job I detest (and that Ren doesn't do due to his back issues).

Me after blowing snow all over myself for the millionth time.
I'm not going to lie; I've been looking forward to taking advantage of this particular obsession of Sky's. Plus, this year, for the first time, since Ren is up and about (Iwillsaynomoreforfearofjinxingit) and therefore able to help with the challenging task of getting the snow blower working after the long spring/summer/fall hiatus, I really expected to have a relaxing afternoon watching everyone else work.

Hahahaha. I'll never learn, but you have to admire my never-ending optimism!

The afternoon actually went something like this:

  1. Sky and I dig two big snow shovels out from under the bikes and brooms and mower and assorted balls and other sports equipment.
  2. I start shoveling the sidewalk between our driveway and the neighbor's.
  3. Ren plugs in the snow blower and pushes the start button. Nothing happens. He repeats some version of this step many times.
  4. I make my way back to our driveway and keep shoveling as Sky rolls around in the yard.
  5. Ren starts cursing at the snow blower that won't start.
  6. Pink and Stow figure out that we are all outside and start putting on all of their snow gear. AGAIN.
  7. Now that everything is wet, Stow can't get it on by himself, so he starts screaming at me from the step in the garage.
  8. I stop shoveling to go help him get untangled from the mess of snow pants and scarf he has created for himself.
  9. Now Sky is throwing snowballs into the air and batting them with the end of his shovel, making a mess that covers the parts of the driveway I'd already cleared.
  10. Pink and Stow think this looks like fun so want my help in finding their shovels which are impossibly lodged behind all the small, handheld electric yard tools.
  11. Ren manages to make it so the snow blower is no longer making any hopeful sounds at all.
  12. Stow and Pink start shoveling the grass.
  13. Sky laments that he really wants to use the snow blower and gets mad at Ren for not letting him.
  14. I'm halfway done with the driveway and tell the kids they will get not screen time for the next century if they don't start actually SHOVELING THE DRIVEWAY!!!
  15. They look at me like I've lost my mind.
  16. Ren determines that the snow blower is out of commission and goes inside to make dinner.
  17. I totally lose my cool when the kids start chasing each other around the back of the house with their shovels overhead and finally manage to guilt them into finishing the rest of the driveway.
  18. I come inside and collapse in my chair convinced I now have bronchitis (I do).

Sigh. At least the snow is fun for SOME of us.

No comments: